Guth & Tuairim, Meán Fómhair 1980

~ocuson 11 Jackie Murphy GLENEA UTD Full Name: Jackie (John) Murphy Birthplace: Falcarragh Height: 5 1 9t" Weight: lot st. Position: Midfield Previous Clubs: Falcarrach Utd. Married: No Favourite Player: John Joe McCafferty Favourite Other Team: Fanad Most Difficult Opponent: Many Most Memorable Matches: Winning All-Ireland U-16. Biggest Thrill: Winning Promotion Best Flace Visited: None in particular. Favourite Food: T-Bone Steaks Miscellaneous Likes: Punk Rock, .T.V. Miscellaneous Dislikes: Losing, Bad Referees Favourite T.V. Shows: Many Favourite Singers: Olivia Newton John, Phil Lynott Favourite Actors/Actresses: Henry Winkler, The Fonz Best Friends: Many Biggest Influence on Career: The Ayahtollah s. Kelly Honours: Gaelic and Soccer Personal Ambitions: To be happy in life . Football Ambitions: To win the Premier League with Glenea Utd. Margaret M. Went in the wrong door in the Ostan - coming back oMt she met a man who looked ~ surprised. Pub a:tuiz ""----- Which person in the World would you most like to meet? My fUture wife. Signature: AI/{/L, Freagra M! LUnasa: Lism & Des Maguire played for 1 ,J. !(.~ Who won two Railway Cup medals on the same day? Cavan ..,..,.. ' and their brother Seamas played for Meath. Sorry I missed the last edition of the local Rag. At. this time of year I go on my annual retreat i.e. I retire into the local alehouses for a couple of weeks to recuperate from the stresses and strains of everyday life. Talking about alehouses, I was standing ·in Huidi Beags the other day when a sudden thought struck me; if you think a gallon of petrol is expensive at '£1.64, spare a thought for us drinkers who pay £4.64, yes £4.64 for a gallon of Guinness. As we are talking about alehouses I see that the anrrual "free for all" Boxing competi tions have ~esumed once more in Dodge City. During the past couple of weeks we have had 2 heavyweight and one lightweight bouts. Overseas competitors - especially from Scotland have been very much involved. ~pectators are advised to come early as bouts may occur at any time. While I am on the subject of boxing is it true that. Derrybeg Youth Club have received the gift of a new boxing ring, sponsored by two Bunbeg shopkeepers, and during the· presentation ceremony the club members sang the well-known folk song "This land is my land, thi~ land is your land 11 • Talking of land, which I wasn't, a recent topographic survey of the Gweedore area shous that Machaire Gathlan cemetery is the "dead centre" of the area. After the recent non-arr'ival of the Chieftains and Liquid Gold in the area I can positively state that the :>:I C.., • 0 g ..... g 0. 0 (1) tJI ::s_ Rolling Stones will l1l2t. now be appearing in Dore Hall in the coming weeks. With Ireland becoming a nation of ct- o abbreviation users the whole country is onr~he brink of :onfusion• . Example~ are C.I.E., E.S.B., C. B., J.R., etc., m When news bl-oke about the closure of the G.t:. factory, w~th the loss of 100 Jobs, a Falcar,rach man was heard tc et- say, "I didn't think 11 Guth 7 Tuairim 11 employed 100 people~ Getting back .sm to the subject of pubs - which i s .g exactly what happened to a Derr.ybeg man, who appeared at the local district court charg9d with sitting on top •; ot the roof of his local pub.. When the judge asked him why, he replied, 11 I heard the drinks were on the housf ''. At the same court an Anagaire woman was fined IR £200 for throwing a pair of trousers down the stairs in her 01. 1 house. The judge told her, "The next time you throw a pair of trousers down the stiars; make sure your husba....; isn't in them. Yea, those Rosses women are a hard breed, which reminds me of the two Burtonport spinsters who 1 went 1 for a tramp on the hills. The tramp just managed to escape after a hard struggle. At this time of year local farmers sometimes decide to put cattle for pasture out on some of the islands off th6 coast of Machaire Gathlan. The islan~ of Inis Sionnai.gh is such an example. Farmers leave their cattle out there for a few months to build them up. To get them out they pull them behind a boat to the island. Such was the case last week. A boat pulling two cows for .Inis Sionnaigh passed another boat contai ning two Ker r;men up here on the f,'irst day of their two week fishing holiday. Says one, pointing to the farmers' boat. 11 Here comes another boat out fishing 11 • Says the other Kerryman, 11 There must be some big fish up here- would you look at the size of the bait they're using on their lines 11 • Standing outside the Hunting Lodge- no it's the Beachcomber- no the Hunting Lodge I think, the other day, a car pulled to a halt and the driver ·asked me, "Where can I find the nearest Boozer?" · I replied, 11 You 1 re looking at him\ 11 LInlocht mac T1omnachan DnA\HNGs «>~ \<lORDs .tRa.n.d.L(